- Khyati Sharma
Limits on exploring the unknowns - Familiarity Needs!
Who should read? 596 words| 5 mins read
Someone who wants to stretch their wings but sticks to known territories in either their relationships, jobs, vacations, hang out spots, etc.
There is a certain risk in being open to experiences, which include a broad range of consequences from a mild discomfort to situations leading to physical harm. Its important to know if you are over indexing on safety and enjoying life a little less than you will want. While it is silly to just try and experience without being adequately prepared, it is equally silly in wanting to do something for life and not trying it. Well, don’t get me wrong I don’t mean extremes like chemicals, but may be adventure sports with the right gear, talk to stranger in a bar, live alone for 2 years, relocate to a new city with no friends, a hot to your dream job, etc. All of these are perfectly doable without causing physical harm to our bodies, but it takes a lot from us to test unknown waters. If you are one such person, don’t worry, I am one of you. Its weird how I like to try new experiences, but oddly enough wait for months, before I enroll in a class or move to a city, or speak to strangers, etc. What is peculiar for me even more is that I was able to do more of it till my early twenties and then could not do it after 25. I realized a few bad experiences where I was under-prepared made me sour, thus I sat down an afternoon to reflect on a navigation strategy.
Off late, I have been able to do a little deep dive of own self-developed limitations, which has started tilting the balance for me, and might do that for you: 1) At times, I limited myself by my weight, but my self-consciousness was a bigger turn off than my weight to the people, 3) nobody really cares what you made of your life, people are there to support/criticize you, but repercussions are all yours. No-one lives your pain or your dreams, 4) Fear leads to procrastination, have a real dialogue with yourself on why the procrastination!, 5) Spontaneous plans are not possible when you grow up, so plan. You have family, a demanding job so plan. I don’t get anything executed if I am not spending time in googling, planning, etc.
It is easy to say all the above with ease, the real challenge is breaking the advice into small executable pieces:
1) Take one step outside of your boundary, e.g. take a job similar to the current one in another city of your home country, 2) Travel/Vacation to a country different than yours when you know the language, 3) Take a short term assignment in a country with more unknowns, when you know you can return to your town, 4) talk to a stranger at crowded bar, 5) Don’t immediately leave your job to be a writer or a blogger, try it part time, observe your discipline and interest, get feedback for your ideas,
Eventually , you will have a framework of treat assessment, and what you can handle, you might expand your horizons, which will elate you. Every time you get anxiety tell yourself, this is not permanent, you can go back to your comfort zone. Treat changes like two way doors or short term assignments. Important thing to note here is if you don’t test anything new, you land with a life of regrets and fears.